haiz... lonely de wo.. [hardtOsaYimsOri]-Ai wO bui zhOu
wa.. shit man ytd i write my blog halfway den i fall aslp den i tink my sis off my com den nw mus rewrite lo...i write alot of things lo... wa.. dir le my sis knw tat i smoke den if she tel my mom den i die le lo... den abt e burn mark if she tel my mom den i fin le lo... wa... wth... den gd lo den there wil be no more abby in tis world...the best sia... den my idiot sis 4get to bring her hp den ask me bring her hp to sch 4 her again.. f lo..her sch at simei leh u tink very fun to go there ar... wth lo..
later im stil wkin e lo.. cant let me rest meh...
haiz.. nw is 735am...if tat things nv happen i nw will be on my way to mit sum1... but haiz... nth to say le.. ytd i woke up at 945am if my mom nv wake me up i will stil be slpin.. den i went to bath lo den pack my bag den pei my mom go eat breakfast.. when i was abt to leave 4 work my mom saw e cuts on my hands n ask y i cut n torture myself wan to die ar.. u askin me y i go cut n torture myself.. u shld ask urself abt it lo.. e 13 cuts on my hand is cause by u.. onli tat u dunno lo...U DUN EVEN KNW THE PAINS IM GOIN THRU nW n TAt TimE 13 FEB... tel u aso no use u wouldnt understand cuz u tink u r always rite... she aso saw e cigar burn mark.. i told her say i cookin tat tm e oil spilt den i burn my hands lo.. she dun believe she tot i go cut a hole on my hands.. crazy sia so er xin lo if i cut a hole on my hand.. i didnt expect e burn to be quite deep too.. nw stil pain,, but who knw my heart got a deep hole too.. tel any1 aso no use they aso wont understand de.. dun say they i myself aso dun understand myself..i dun even knw wat i wan in tis hell life of mine.. wat r my goals in life... i rather die better man.. my mom say e most important things to do nw is work hard n palan my career 4 my future n nt love... u dun nd ppl to love u meh.. dun u knw wat e feelin when u cant tel e sum1 tat u luv them... or tat u stil luv them.. or sum1 who luv u but u csnt be wif tat person cuz tat person is nt sum1 u luv in ur heart n u aso dun wan to hurt tat person.. it even painful if u cant get to c them or even knw hw r they gettin along.. u cant be there 4 them.. feel so useless n hlpless rite nw...haiz... i ytd smoke 5 sticks nw left wif 2 sticks nia... dunno whether to buy ma.. haiz.. anyw i already half dead smoke more die earlier.. so i goin to smoke si wo... anyway who cares..
lucky ytd nt so bz ytd so slack lo.. i doin cashier again.. den ard 5 plus edwin cm cuz he cm to check his schedule den aso waitin 4 me to end wk n send me hm lo.. as uaual he pei me bring my dog 4 a walk.. he lyk my father lyk tat.. i told him u look lyk my father leh can call u laopa ma.. he say i wan be ur laogong nt ur laopa.. i jus laugh lo.. ytd he say im e onli gal tat he nv knw he will cherish..he say le den i look away lo.. nth to say.. i knw he treat me gd all those but haiz.. dun wan say le.. [hurts] bleedin-teArs of mY HeaRT...-
haiz.. later got work at 3 i nw wanna go rest 4 awhile very tired sia.. workin until 11 again.. rch hm will be ard 1210 den aft bring august dwn 4 a walk will be 1 ba.. den do sum hsewk fin will be 130 ba.. haiz.. everyday lyk tis go on... sianZ...
miSsin eUU....dUn tell me U duNno taT iM still miSsin U..aS day gO by im miSsin u mOre n More....dunNo wheN i will have e cHance tO c U agaIn or tO be wif U agaiN..i wAitiN 4 taT day tAt u will cM bk to mY life agaIn..will taT day eveR cm..?i juS caNt fOrget ur pretTy faCe..uR cute sMile...ur Sweet smeLL..ur BeautifuL vOice...thE care N coNcern taT u hV shower on me...i cAnt fOrget e hUgs..thE kisses...the haPpy n saD time we been thru tOgether...evEn thoUgh we beeN tOgether fOR onlY a shOrt time..tiS memorieS is eNough tO lasT fOR a LIFE tiME...wHen iT all faLL apArt...i wiLL knOw deEp in my heArt...thE only tHing tAt mattEr haVE cm tRUE...In tiS life I waS luv by eUU...
